Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Snow Love

I know my dad loves my mom for one reason. When it snows, he either drives her to work (she really hates the snow, that's why I got my license 1 day after I turned 16), or, if he can't do that, he shovels the driveway, the sidewalks, scrapes her car and salts the street near their closest intersection so she doesn't slide out.

It's not the huge gestures, it's not cars as gifts or diamonds (although for their 25th, he got her one). It's shoveling snow.

I know my parents love me because they call whenever it snows to remind me to get up early to give myself time to scrape and get to work, or back in the day, school.

Love and caring show themselves in the worst weather conditions.

The BF scraped my car after "House" last night.


I am feeling very calm about this latest massive onslaught of wintery wonderful (i.e. snow). I don't know why, I think it's hormonal. The drive into work wasn't bad at all and neither was the drive home (now that I've said that, it will be crap tomorrow). I am the slowest person out there so, yes, I hold up traffic. Go around me, I don't care, I will laugh as I pass your burning vehicle when it crashes into the guardrail. OK, that's not true, but it is alright to go slow in 6 inches of snow. It is, I swear.

I finished decorating my office, very classy, all white and gold. Not that cheap, lamee gold, nice gold. Church gold. Mom and dad are bringing me their extra decorations so I can finish it up. Everyone said it looked very nice. GOLD!

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Birthday from Heaven

I am officially 25. A quarter century, which everyone seems keen on reminding me of at every turn, especially the BF. He's older, he shouldn't be talking. This has been my best birthday ever, at least in recent memory. And here is why:

Last Saturday, I went to the spa and you all know how much I loved that.

On Thanksgiving, the family was together to give me cards and happy wishes.

On Friday, my actually birthday, the BF came over and we spent the day together (Lizzy Time, as he called it, as opposed to his usual Man Time). It was very fun. We went to the mall to check out the sales (they were minimal) and to see if there was anything that I might want as a present. He had some ideas but I said they were too expensive (I chose a movie and a CD). We also went to see Casino Royale, which was great. One of the better Bond films I've seen in a while. Really very good. Of course there was some nookie involved in the day, but those details are for him and me only.

Today, the girls and I went to brunch and I put up my Christmas tree.

Next Saturday, my big celebration takes place downtown. It's a big birthday and therefore deserves a big celebration.

My Strange Little Family

When someone can't be at your house for the holidays, normally, you think of them, wish they were there and get on with your day. With my family, when someone (the LLS) can't be home for Thanksgiving, we set a place for her and put a picture of her on a chair. "We aren't as strange as you think we are," quoth dad to the BF at dinner. Um, yes we are. Last year, we (I, actually) made a life size LLS dummy and set it up at the table. We just wish she was there. This is our way of showing this and that we love her.

The BF came over for a preliminary Thanksgiving with us. We were then going to go to his parent's house for a second dinner with his family. Somehow the times were mixed up, no one is to blame, although I think his mom blames me a little bit. Still a good holiday though.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Regression Not so Theraputic

I am at my parent's house right now, gearing up for the big gorge-fest that is Thanksgiving. My youngest sister is here too. And just like always, I am acting like a brat with her around. I don't know why, but with her i act like a bitch and with the LLS I act like a domineering, morality compass I wish sh would go by, pushing some agenda on her I bearly subscribe to in the hopes taht she will find her way.

I hate regressing to that annoying little kid I know i am being. It's like my dad when he's around his father, he starts biting his nails and slumps in his seat. it's incredibly annoying. I know he is stronger than that

I love my sisters andIi hate who I become around them. I can only blame the stroke for my behavior for so long.

I am resolving to be a better person around my sisters from here on out. I will be sweet and kind and gentle and support them in their endeavors and love adventures.

I am strong, I can do this...or is the big sister gene going to kick in and I will just revert back to my old way? I am at least going to try.

The Baby is a lot to take on a first visit, especially if you don't know her at all. We're used to her.

Man, the pronoun "I" is used a lot in this post. I am not this selfish, usaully.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

The Legand

Robert Altman died yesterday. Let's have a moment.

My Kingdom for a Spa Day

Let me just tell you. If you have never been to a spa, they are god’s gift to us and should be enjoyed for all they’re worth. I went for the first time on Saturday with the mom. It was my birthday present from the rentals and it was divine. Massage, facial and manicure.


The only other massage I have ever gotten was a therapeutic one that hurt like hell. I blogged about it, you remember. This was an hour long relaxing massage with lavender oil and I was a puddle afterwards. If she had asked me to sign over my soul at that point, I would have. I have been telling the BF he needs to go to massage school and this just renewed my enthusiasm for the particular career move (he won’t do it, but it’s a nice dream).

Then, the facial. My skin has never felt so good or so even toned. Also very relaxing, darkened room, steam, masks, happiness. At this point I have been naked for about 2 and a half hours (there was a robe, you perverts) so I begrudgingly put my clothes back on and got my mani.

My manicurist was very nice, very talkative, which was a change from my other two relaxation facilitators (Maggie and the esthetician who I cannot name for the life of me). Then lunch with mom and trying to figure out what to do next. We decided that I would help her with some projects down in A-town and she would make me dinner. Since I am never one to pass up free meal, I called the BF and asked him to meet me down there in a few hours as dad needed some help with the new monstrosity of a TV he’d just bought. This thing is huge, great picture, but huge!

He got that all hooked up (he’s very techno-savvy), now with more than three colors and sound and we had dinner with the rentals.

Anyway, I think I need to find a good massage place and do that a few times a year. Once every 25 years is so not enough.


Does making the bed topless make the forthcoming sex better…I think so.

I was distracted all day yesterday. Think it had something to do with one of the following things: hormones, the holidays quickly approaching, my birthday coming up in THREE DAYS and the aforementioned sex (the BF has gone primal, it’s still sweet and tender, but with a little something extra. It’s very fun).

Who am I kidding, it’s all of them. Although, as usually, my gifts are almost done, not as early as per usual, but still with some good lead time.

Birthday plans are underway. First, the family celebration on Thanksgiving (my second favorite holiday). Second, the BF celebration on Friday, my actual b-day. I wanted him to cook me dinner, since he claims he can cook (I think this was just a rouse to make me like him, not necessary, I liked him right off the bat. He doesn’t need to be domestic, as long as he can fix things). He vetoed the cooking idea so we are going to see James Bond (Casino Royale). The friend celebration will take place in December. Bar hopping, no preparing necessary.

The BF and I were driving in the truck (it’s the only truck I have spent any amount of time in, so it’s “the” truck), on our way to watch football at Jason‘s. Not the deli, an actual person. Anyway, we were talking about how Gus and Chinchilla had ditched us again. They are still in new couple mode (sick and wrong on like three levels), so they can’t tear themselves away from the vicinity of her bed for longer than a bathroom break. I said that we settled very quickly into old couple mode. Don’t get me wrong, we are still cute as hell; be we aren’t on each other all the time. And he said that if that hadn’t happened as quickly as it did, we probably wouldn’t be going to Jason’s to watch football. And I thought about and it’s so true. We are comfortable with each other, but still try to impress the other person. We are a settled, new couple. It’s a whole new genre of coupliness.

Friday, November 17, 2006


Why does no one use the crosswalk anymore? I saw two people today at two different times of the day crossing the street without using the crosswalk. One was about 25 feet from it but that doesn't count.

Anyway. Many happy things to report today. First , they offered me a permanent position at my company. You see, I have been working through an agency and will continue to do so until December 18, when I become THE WORLD"S GREATEST ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT EVER!! My degree is such a big, bloody, expensive waste.

Also, you know how I have been trying to get rid and/or pawn off my tanning contract? Well, tonight I did it. I was leaving the Evil Tanning Conglomerate and Very Younger Employee was showing the place to someone. I was going to talk to her, but I have tried doing that in the past and it usually turns out to be a waste of my time. So I dropped some things off at Kinko's for work, but I had a feeling and went back to the tanning place. This person was actually going to buy a contract, so yea! We have to go back on Tuesday and switch things and I am home free. This is a relief, because you know I have been trying to get rid of this thing for a while now. Bully for me.

The BF and I drank a bottle of wine last night. I have never done that with anyone. I got a little tipsy, but I was not hungover this morning. I really don't get hangovers. Although I do crave bread products when I drink a lot. Silver Mine is god.

I met Crazy Man this morning. I imagined him fatter, but no, just a bit paunchy. Still crazy though. Two incident reports had to be made, there was babbling.

Movie Review: Mission Impossible III, in HD no less. Very cool movie, the best of the 3. But I must say , do they have to have the same plot...the bad guy is really someone everyone knows within the organization. Betrayal really is the ultimate evil I guess. Good flick though.

Please read the following article, I think you'll agree with me that the Bush administration is not only out of touch with the needs and concerns of the nation, but also is completely out of touch with REALITY, that harsh little reminder of the real world and its consequences. Good lord, this is 2006, you’d think he'd get a clue.

Thursday, November 16, 2006


What are laurels and why can't I rest on them? They sound so comfy.

The BF was supposed to come over last night, after VB, but he forgot his laptop and cancelled. His house in in between VB and me. He could have swung by, picked up the computer and come over. Nope, didn't happen. I was a tad upset. Of course this was 2am, so how upset could I have really been.

I am crafting this week, no, not my plan to take over the world, although that is coming along nicely, thank you for asking. I always overdo Christmas (I spend way too much money, money I dan't have see where I'm going?). So this year, I am taking the frugal, understated approach and making many of my gifts. I got a lot of great ideas off the internet and this incredibly overpriced catalog that was addressed to no one at work. I am just toning down their stuff and making it my own. I think it's ingenious. I hope you all agree.

What else...The LLS is not moving back home. I haven't mentioned this before or her thoughts on doing so because she is sneaky and didn't want people to know she was thinking about it. But she likes her life in the CA so she is staying put.

I was busy all day at work today. Getting ready for the end of the year and what not, everyone had something for me to do. I spent the last 2 hours going through 3" files looking for a single document (and reading the files as I did, I told you I was nosy). Some of our tenants have led such sad lives, I feel for them. But not the ones with noise complaints, they just bug me.

I had an encounter with a severely unhinged man on the phone today. There was ranting, raving, threats of DNA tests and high priced lawyer getting. Thing is, if you live in one of our properties, you so can't afford any kind of high priced lawyer getting. It was sad, but also freakin' hilarious. I call him Crazy Man.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

In 10 days I will turn 25. Now, usually around my birthday, I lament growing older. But for some reason, this birthday seems different. Twenty-five is going to be a banner year. So I would like to use this opportunity to take stock in my existence.

- I have a wonderful family who loves me

- I have great friends

- I have a good job

- I have a super-fantastic boyfriend with killer eyes and a wicked smile who fixes my computer and programs my remotes. He also has an ass you could bounce a quarter off of, which I recommend that you all do

- I have my health, although I think I have TB

- My cat thinks I’m cool

- My insurance is going to go down by $60

- I have a great education under my belt…or cap, really

- I have never had a cavity

- I have fans…that’s you, pretty reader

- I have seen parts of the world and this country that most people don’t get to see

- I have been in good relationships and bad relationships and learned from them all, I think.

- I have damn near perfect breasts

I have a good life. And while some of my most recent postings do not reflect that, I am blaming hormones and hoping that you’ll forget all about it. However I am still standing by my claim that the new museum is soulless.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

My sanctuary is no more.

My entire life has been spent in the appreciation of art and the idea that it is the purest expression of the human soul. That was truly put to the test yesterday when I went to the new and “improved” Art Museum. Four new floors of pretentious crap in a brand new building that while is beautiful, it cannot make up for what it is filled with.

First of all, it is no longer free to enter the galleries. It costs $10 to enter the museum. The exhibitions aren’t even worth that. I tried staying as long as possible, to get my money’s worth, but I couldn’t stand to be in that place. It is no longer the quiet sanctuary where I could go and escape. It is now an over-crowded mass of human beings and bad art.

Secondly, dead things are not art, never have been, never will be. When I was in college, I worked on the school paper doing the art and theatre reviews. Some of the student art was wonderful and I hope they have long careers ahead of them. And then sometimes you get the guy who stayed up all night the day before the show working on his pieces. The guy who thought that if he put bags of rotting meat on the floor, he’d he avant garde and “oh, isn’t he so cool and creative.” Bah! There were several of these dead things as art in the Modern Art wing. Cow’s head in formaldehyde, butterflies pasted to a wall with yellow paint, a bag of trash. These things aren’t art. I hope they didn’t pay too much for them.

Thirdly, ten Impressionist works does not a gallery make; especially when you had 5 of them before. Now there are situated in a cold, characterless corner, instead of in an airy gallery. Impressionism is my favorite movement, they couldn’t expand that section? No they had to inundate you with Western art, which is my least favorite style.

At least they are adding to that collection. But in a corner, seriously?

I loved the museum because it was quiet and never crowed. Now I can’t see any of the pieces because people do not know gallery etiquette. You stand at least 5 feet away from a work to admire it and only step closer when you are not in anyone else’s way. It’s about being aware of your surroundings while appreciating the works. It is not about standing 5 inches from a work, while in someone’s way and not moving, as if you are staying there to piss everyone else off.

You never speak in a normal voice level. You speak in hushed, reverent tones out of respect for the other patrons and the beauty that is in front of you. And you keep your children quiet. I am all for exposing the young things to art and culture, but keep them quiet. I don’t like badly behaved children.

All I heard around me was pretentious conversation around me as well. They turned my museum into a big city cesspool for the ostentatious masses.

There was one piece that could be of use though. It was a huge ashtray. They could just throw everything in there and light it up.

There was one thing that I am happy they added. The photography area, small though it is, is wonderful. Feature Diane Arbus, who had a knack for capturing the elements of society that while may not b beautiful, you can’t tear your eyes away from them.

And there was one piece in the Modern wing that was just beautiful. It was called “Epiphany” by Gottfried Helnwein and it was a version of the Adoration of the Magi using Nazis. It was gorgeous. Ok, I know that sounds horrible, but it was pretty.

Those are the end of my notes. I had to wait to write about it or even more angry words would have come pouring forth from my fingertips.

My sanctuary is no more. That is incredibly sad.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Hug a Vet

Tomorrow is Veteran’s Day and being the daughter and granddaughter of 3 vets, it’s a special day for me. My dad and grandfathers are the most important men in my life, sorry BF, it’s true.

They are brave and strong and I am so glad that I have had a lifetime to be with and learn from them. We are a lucky family.

Vets make me incredibly weepy. I was reading some Veteran’s Day cartoon and I was tearing up like none other. I went through 3 tissues before I had to stop reading. I wish I still lived in DC. I would spend the day at the memorials, with my little American flag pinned to my bag.

Instead, I am going to write my granddaddies a thank you note and try to convince the BF to go to the art museum with me. He’s an artist, you’d think he’d jump at it.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Sunglasses at Night

It’s a scary thought when you realize that you sleep walked one night. I think I remember getting up and refilling my water bottle and putting it on my nightstand; but it wasn’t there this morning. It was, however, on the table in my entry.

Freaky, huh?

My mom, the most un-techo savvy person alive, except maybe a 9 year old in Gambia, has her own blog. The LLS thinks she’s where I get my humor from. I am so proud of the Mom. She’s trying to jump those techno hurdles. You can read it too: I am painted in a very flattering light, you should take a look.

I talked t my boss’s son on the phone the other day. He’s a smacker. I hate smackers. They’re boorish and disgusting. Why put something in your mouth right before you dial the phone? I saw this guy at the pool hall (the one where the BF and I met, aww), he was revolting. Smacking…mouth open while he chewed. Was he not taught any semblance of manners? I tried staring him down thinking he’ll notice and stop, but no. Completely oblivious. No wonder he continues to be a pig.

I made two trips to buy ink today for one of my co-workers. She’s doing some once yearly report thingy. My question is, why can’t she use the printer/scanner/copier/fax in the back. It’s faster, and way less of a hassle for me.

I have spent the last few days organizing the invitees for the office holiday party, which is coming along swimmingly. The fact that no ones contact lists are universal and my boss has the worst handwriting on earth made it a bit of a task, but I got it done. Be proud.

Should be a fun time though. The only ones there will be people who are two to three times my age, talking about property law and banking. And I get to stay the entire time, help out and probably help clean up after our 223 invitees. Oh, yeah, should be a hoot.

Oh, and can you believe Rumsfeld resigned? He must have seen how the House and the Senate were now Dem controlled and felt his power slipping. Or he realized he was a moron for invading a country with no plan whatsoever. He must have good friends who are willing to stab him in the front (it's Oscar Wilde, read something will you), let him take the fall for all of Bush's mistakes and whatnot. You decide.

Monday, November 06, 2006


I was going to write some more about tomorrow’s election, but I am too incensed to discuss that now. Except to say that 90% of this election’s ads were negative. And they wonder why fewer and fewer people vote every year.

I have something else I would like to talk about: RAPE.

A co-worker’s friend’s daughter was raped this weekend. She was drugged, taken to a car and driven around during the incident. That means there was not one, but TWO rapist involved (they should both be castrated). Thankfully she had the sense to report it and go to the hospital. But this asshole is claiming it was consensual. Let’s break this down. First, how do these people find each other? What kind of person is willing to take part in something as depraved and vile as a rape, let alone, be friends with someone who is? Two, this poor girl was violated and now she will have to go through it all again if and when this goes to trial. The defense lawyer is going to tear her apart, bring up all and any misdeeds just to make her look unreliable and probably slutty. No one asks for rape, but they will make it look like she did.

I have had some regrettable partners in the past, but I have never claimed rape. Not many people do that, but enough have that the pigs out there think they can get away with it if they just claim “oh, it was consensual, she’s just embarrassed.” Consensual is a lawyer word. No one could think of a defense like this except for some slimy lawyer. I hate our world where something like this can happen.

I gave my co-worker RAINN’s number for her to give to her friend’s daughter. The Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network (RAINN) is a 24 hour hotline for victims of assault. They can be reached at 1.800.656.HOPE. They are staffed with counselors and people who want to help those who have been victimized.

What kind of society breeds these kinds of monsters, certainly not one I want to be a part of? How do cops see this everyday and go home at night?

PS – Watch your drinks at the bar, those drugs are damn near untraceable because they metabolize so fast. Watch your friends; don’t let them go off with strangers, even if they seem cognitive. EVIL IS OUT THERE.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Get out the Vote

It is election time here in The Middle. And let me just say, this is the whinist election I have ever seen. With all the muck-racking and negitivity, it is surprising that these people are considered adults. They are more like bickering children in the back of the car, if you ask me. There are several big issues (same ones as last time, it never changes, my rage just grows) that this election is covering and I just wanted to let you all know my opinions on them, because well, you choose to read this blog and therefore value my opinion in some small way.

The big issues this year are marriage and drugs.

There is all this blather about how domestic partnership undermines the concept of marriage...well, guess what? They are do that themselves. Fifty-two percent of marriages end in divorce. And they are giving us this crap about how if 2 men or 2 women choose to be with each other, they are going to bring down society. HA! Logic is clearly not their strong suit. That's been proven so many times.

On that note, they also bring up the arguement, if you can call it that, that gay parents raise gay kids. Sorry no, any human born has as much of a chance of being gay as the next person. If you don't believe that, then why do gay people come from straight families?

I do not advocate drug use in anyway. I like a stiff drink every now and again, but that's not illegal. Anyway, I say if you can grow it, leave it alone. When you have to create it in a lab type setting and HASMAT has to clean it up, that's bad.

And there are a couple more. And you should read them, form some opinions and do something about them.

The governors race is just a joke at this point, as is the congressional race. The Republican candidates are douches. The Democratic candidates are tools. I don't want to vote in those races. I don't like any of the candidates, but I don't want to waste my vote, I have done that enough when I was younger and didn't do my research.

I feel disillusioned when I research, the mystique is gone. It's like sitting too close to the stage.

On a final note, The Government has no right to regulate or push their opinions onto me about who I love or choose to marry, what I do to my body or how I end my life.